Oh, yes, she did ask The Question!

I was feeling pretty sassy on Saturday wearing a new top in my “pop color,” a colorful scarf as a belt, my key necklace and cute shoes.

See??

fantabulous women dressing for your body type

I don’t THINK I look pregnant…??

Until the bagger at my local grocery store (a teenage girl, maybe 16) asked The Question:

“Are you having a baby?”

I felt like I melted into a puddle right there in the check-out lane. I felt my face flush and my blood pressure rise.

Partly because we’d recently tried to have a baby with no luck. Partly because I realized that I LOOKED pregnant (no one wants that unless they are) and partly because I knew she’d be embarrassed to find out that I’m not.

“Nope. I am sure not.”

The cashier asked, “WHAT did she say??”

I replied, “She said I was fat.”

I admit, that comment was meant to teach the bagger a lesson. Did I interpret her question that way? No. But many women would. Unless a woman is VERY CLEARLY pregnant, it’s better to not comment.

The bagger was aghast.

I smiled and told her, “I’m giving you a hard time. It’s an honest question. We were trying but, no, I’m not pregnant.”

I could tell she felt terrible.

“Why did you think so?” I asked.

I often wonder if I sometimes still let my hand linger over my belly like I did for those 18+ months I’ve been pregnant. Or if it was just the lower belly pooch left over from carrying two eight-plus pound babies to 40 weeks gestation combined with poor posture resulting from too much time hunched over a laptop.

“Do I LOOK pregnant?” I asked.

She shrugged sheepishly. “Only from the side.”

Ah, yes.

According to Shari Braendel’s book “Good Girls Don’t Have To Dress Bad,” I have an ‘x’ body type–proportionate over all (as far as hips to shoulders).

But I tend to also be a ‘b’, meaning I gain weight in my belly and hips. Shari cautions ‘b’ types from tucking their shirts in or wearing belts around the waist. Why? Because you get this:

dress your body type fantabulous women

Ugh-oh. A belt just accentuates my post-baby belly.

Notice what happens when I untuck my shirt and put the belt OVER the top.

hide trouble spots dress for your body

Hide your trouble spots!

dress body type fantabulous women

The one to blame for the belly pooch. But who cares?? It’s disguised now!

Note to self: Don’t accentuate the belly area–camouflage it!

Do you dress for your body type? What can you not wear?

For more about dressing for your body type, stay tuned to the blog or find FanTABulous Women on Pinterest!

My NEW FanTABulous Women Teaching Series!

LADIES!

I am thrilled to announce the launch of a long-time dream of mine–I am starting an eight-week teaching series right in my own home, all about being a FanTABulous Woman!

Here’s a blurb from my Facebook event page:

This is the best of what I teach, preach and blog about, all in one series!

The tools, resources and accountability women need to live a life of passion, confidence and influence.

Come to a class you need, come to share your own expertise, come to network or just come to hang out and have a cup of tea!

Practical, simple and hands-on, this eight-week series will be held every Tuesday night in my home studio in south Chandler. 5:30-6:00 is tea time, 6:00-8:00 is class and 8:00-8:30 is networking and Q&A.

{see the list of classes below}

You are encouraged to join the FanTABulous Women community for $350 (payable by check or Paypal).

Your membership includes:

  • an all-access pass to all classes in the series all year long
  • an invitation to the FanTABulous Women secret Facebook group
  • FREE admission to field trips plus discounts on retreats
  • a thirty minute one-on-one Creative Consultation with me
  • EVERYTHING you see in the photo below (yes, the basket, too!)
  • the FanTABulous Women notebook with ALL course materials and handouts
  • the best of my personal library (“Good To Great” by Jim Collins, “Simple Abundance” by Sarah Ban Breathnach, “Good Girls Don’t Have to Dress Bad” by Shari Braendel and “Organized Simplicity” by Tsh Oxenreider)
  • pocket color wheel
  • customized makeup look and compact (three eye shadows, blush and lipstick or gloss)
  • journal
  • “Satin Hands” set for at-home pampering

The retail value of the materials alone is well over $400.

FanTABulous Women teaching series course materials

All included when you join the FanTABulous Women community!

You may also audit any class(es) you choose for $25, which includes the handouts for that night. You may buy books and materials individually, too, but the real value is in the package deal, above.

Feel free to invite a friend, colleague or family member to come along!

WEEKLY COURSE TOPICS:

1. Living an authentic life according to your personal mission statement.
2. Practicing practical spirituality and living with an attitude of gratitude.
3. Style and wardrobe help, dressing your body and revamping your closet.
4. Color analysis, creating a daily makeup look and following a daily skin care routine.
5. Home: having a “Mom Cave,” hospitality, entertaining and “Good Enough Housekeeping.”
6. Health & wellness, fertility, sleep, self-care, at-home pampering and making time for yourself.
7. The Five Love Languages, friendships, mentoring and creating your own board of directors.
8. Communication, networking, maintaining your online presence, pursuing your passion.

Check out my Events Page for the current dates.

For more information, message me on Facebook or visit the Facebook event page.

Beauty Lessons

Aaaaah, beauty.

Whether plain or gussied up, women can downplay or overplay their beauty for all the wrong reasons.

On any given day, we can interact with a woman who looks totally put-together but is falling apart on the inside…or a woman who looks like a hot mess but actually has it all going on.

Some truly fashionable women can’t afford stylish clothes while some of the richest women I know always look like they forgot to take a peek in their gold gilded mirror that morning.

Skinny girls may have an eating disorder or a medical condition…and the same goes for bigger girls!

Who can ever tell!?!

The point, of course, is that you can’t assume anything about a woman based on her looks.

I’ve learned not to assume anymore. I do know for sure, however, that EVERY woman struggles with her looks and how it relates to her identity and EVERY woman wants to look and feel beautiful.

As a long-time fan of all things beauty and as someone who has struggled with various aspects of my physical appearance ALL of my life, here are a few lessons I have learned first hand, whether from women I have met or from my own struggles and triumphs.

  • Sometimes the prettiest woman in the room is also the most insecure and is just trying to prove something (usually to herself).
  • Sometimes the least attractive woman in the room is also the most well-adjusted, delightful and confident.
  • Sometimes the ‘plain’ girls don’t want attention from anyone, especially males, because they only male attention they’ve gotten has been negative.
  • Sometimes the ‘plain’ girls don’t think they deserve attention from ANYone and prefer to stay hidden (but secretly yearn to feel beautiful and be complimented).
  • Sometimes the ‘plain’ girls are 100% OK and just prefer to look plain.
  • Sometimes the girls who always look ‘put together’ are neither overly confident nor overly insecure–they have just learned how to put themselves together.
  • EVERY woman is insecure about SOME aspect of her appearance.
  • You have at least one physical feature that someone you know envies.
  • No one is going around trying to guess your dress or bra size. I once revealed that I was finally able to fit back into a size six dress and several people said, “I thought you were always like a size 4!” Um…no. We tend to think WE look bigger than we are, but we guess other people are SMALLER than they are. Go figure. {pun intended}
  • If you go to an event and feel awkward about something related to your appearance and feel like everyone will notice, rest assured that every woman in the room is too busy obsessing about her OWN appearance to give any thought to yours.
  • You’d be surprised at how many gorgeous women wish they could just blend in and be appreciated for something other than their looks.
  • You’d be surprised at how many below-average women would give anything to look beautiful–if only they knew how.
  • Sometimes that thin girl you envy is actually so stressed out that she has lost her appetite (that was me once)…
  • …and the girl who is ‘chubby’ is on steroid asthma inhalers that cause her to retain water and puff up (also me once).
  • Sometimes the woman who overdoes it on the makeup and hair and looks like she’s just begging for attention is actually a cosmetology student who has NO ‘dad issues’ and just likes to play with hair and makeup styles!
  • Sometimes the woman who achieves an ‘effortlessly messy’ look actually spent all morning on it….
  • ….yet the woman who looks like she spent the day in a salon actually DOES wake up looking that way! {I am not that woman}
  • I have learned the importance of making an effort to look my best EVERY day, so you definitely can’t assume anything about me from how I look! :)

What Beauty Lessons have YOU learned over the years, about yourself or others?

Beauty Lessons from FanTABulousWomen.com

Copyright Tabitha Dumas, online and in-persona image consultant Gilbert Chandler, Arizona. All right reserved.